Why resisting change can make it tougher

There was a time I pushed myself too far. And I constantly felt miserable for not being as far yet. And the worst thing? I didn’t even realise it. I kept working. I kept pushing until I felt drained one day. I jumped from one activation, course and healing session to the next, trying to manifest or create the life I truly desired. But something felt challenging all the time. I remembered when a couple of times my intuition told me to stop taking so many courses and trying so hard to manifest and instead, take time to trust my own inner guidance and apply what I learned in those courses, and yet, I was ignoring those signs or at least I didn’t trust my own intuition. I was longing for more knowledge and without a doubt, taking courses can be great! Courses can help you find inspiration. However, in my case, the need to book another course and another course often reflected my unconscious pattern of not feeling healed enough. Not feeling good enough. Not feeling capable enough of trusting myself. I had so much knowledge, and yet I still couldn’t manifest. And by participating in one healing course after the next, in one activation after the next, I did have new downloads, new ideas and new visions, things that a lot of people dream of, but I was lacking one thing: embodiment and trust in myself. I couldn’t handle making those ideas a reality as I was still operating from my old limiting self of “not feeling capable enough.” And that was one reason why I couldn’t turn my visions into reality. And the lesson was this: You have to embody the version that can follow your ideas and dreams otherwise you cannot “manifest.” Because every time you are nudged to take action, there is this “I cannot do it now, maybe tomorrow” excuse. Because I hadn’t learned to embody the new version of me. There came a point I pushed myself too far. I had various ideas and visions, but I couldn’t get anything manifested into the physical world. And while there were several reasons for it that I later discovered, I want to highlight one reason I wouldn’t do anymore: putting myself under so much pressure and jump from one healing session to the next to get there as quickly as possible. Instead, I took a different approach and I started to allow myself to grow at my own pace. Instead, I learned to listen to my own body. I learned of methods how to deal with my own fears rather than becoming dependent on a healer or coach all the time asking them what the next step for me was. Don’t get me wrong. It’s great to get help and have healing sessions. But in my case, I’ve seen you can take it to a level where it no longer serves you at the highest. It almost becomes like an addiction. Just like some people are addicted to smoking, others are addicted to constantly booking another healing session. Often not because you need it, it’s rather acting on the subconscious pattern of not feeling healed or good enough. But it’s not true. You can always take the next step. And that’s exactly it. You don’t have to have everything healed or figured out. Knowing the next step is more than enough. Also, you cannot just heal. You need time to embody and integrate, too. So instead of trying to have ALL my fears and limitations healed by others, I learned methods on how to deal with my own fears when they arise. And that’s what finally brought me results. I put away the pressure of getting somewhere quickly or trying to have it all figured out. I no longer asked others what they thought would be the right step for me. Instead, I started to trust myself. I finally started to trust that my own soul has its own rhythm. I learned to flow with the rhythm of life. And to be honest, it’s sometimes easier said than done. But it’s also the most rewarding. Because you gain a deeper trust in yourself. You get to learn to trust your intuition. You get to trust yourself to do it the way that feels most aligned to you. You get to know yourself better. You know when to rest and when to take action. And ironically, that’s when you can progress the most. What sounds like a contradiction is not. At the beginning, I was trying to get activated. I rushed from one course to the next hoping to manifest my dream life as quickly as possible and I could get some results but other times it backfired. I felt worn out. And I am glad I did. Because it gave me that big learning lesson to stop rushing. Stop putting pressure on myself. Stop trying to “get” somewhere as fast as possible. Finding my own rhythm was what finally helped me solve this problem. When I stopped rushing, I allowed myself to take little actions each day. And what seemed like tiny little steps added up after a while. And that’s another thing I learned about manifestation. It’s not that one healing session or course that will solve your life. It’s not that one big action that will finally make you have it all – of course there are miracles. But often, it’s the little steps and consistent action that bring you the results you want. In other words, it's not just about learning, it's applying what you learn. Because you learn with each action that you take. You embody more of who you truly are and you learn to spot and release what no longer serves. That makes you powerful. Because suddenly you become aware of your own internal beliefs, excuses, emotions and fears that hold you back. You learn to navigate them better. That’s why I can highly recommend finding your own rhythm. Don’t stress if someone tells you they manifested their dream life in “6 months” and you’re still not there after 2 years and you start feeling miserable. Each soul has its own rhythm. And souls are not in a rush anyway. When you slow down and put off the pressure, you allow yourself to move at your own pace. That feels so peaceful. There is so much flow coming in just going at your own pace. And that’s when you suddenly come so far as you give up on the pressure. It reminds me a bit of driving a car. When you rush through on the fast lane, you might be there a bit earlier, but it can feel so stressful and exhausting; you may barely have the time to enjoy the car ride. You are constantly trying to pass the other cars and getting there fast. You may even need a break when you get to your destination. When you move in a slower and yet steady pace that feels most aligned to you, you can enjoy the process. You feel relaxed. And sometimes you realise that being in the fast lane doesn't necessarily bring you faster to your destination, as you may come across obstacles, too. If you constantly feel unhealed or constantly think you need another course and another activation, and you feel this constant pressure inside you, stop and pause for a moment. Ask yourself: is it really what I need? Or do I act on subconscious patterns? For all those that are interested in working with me further. In my latest Masterclass “Overcome your fears”, I teach you all about how I learned to spot excuses, fears and limiting beliefs – exactly what holds you back from taking consistent action each day. I show you how you can release that in your pace in order to take consistent action. With the right methods, you can move at your own pace and learn to trust your own inner guidance to take the next step. You realise you are far better off than you think! It's often just our own inner critic that makes us believe we are not far enough. In the end, manifestation is not always about getting results fast. It’s about embodying more of who you truly are and do more of what you truly love. That will bring you lasting success. Give yourself the time you need.

I remember back in 2020 I travelled to Sri Lanka. My intuition told me to travel there. Yet, back then I had no idea it was my intuition. It was just a strong attraction or pull. Like sometimes some countries call us. We feel a strong pull without really describing what exactly it is. It was during the pandemic that people advised me not to go there. On top of that, Sri Lanka experienced some political upheaval. But my intuition, something from within, pulled me there. So I trusted myself, back then I wouldn’t often trust myself, but it was one of those moments I didn’t care what other people told me. When I arrived in Sri Lanka, I felt like home. Not that I would move there, but something was like home. Like arriving somewhere familiar. Where you could relax straight away. Where your nervous system calms down. Where you are in awe. On my way from the airport to the destination was a 2-hour drive. I was in awe by the nature – so many palms, bananas – driving along the ocean left me speechless. I could quickly relax. I could reflect on life. I felt so good. Sri Lanka has a great energy – at least I noticed that if a place calls you then because something matches within you. In Sri Lanka, I didn‘t observe or experience any political upheaval as described in the news – which made me realise that the news can dramatize and exaggerate and even put things that are simply not accurate – and the scarier thing is how many people buy into the news without knowing the truth. I experienced so much friendliness and kindness. The Sri Lankan I met were one of the kindest people I’ve ever met. And I heard from others they found Sri Lankis aggressive – and that was my second realisation. You cannot generalise! And surely not generalise for a whole nation. Let’s be honest, there are rude individuals in every country and yet there are as many nice people in every single country. IT made me realise it depends how you encounter people too. It depends on your own energy and how you treat other people. Then one evening, I took a TukTuk which is like a motorbike and bicycle in one – somehow their equivalent to a car, cars are less frequent, at least at that time. I met a TukTuk driver who wanted to charge me more than the other drivers. And I started to bargain and he insisted on the price and I couldn’t see anyone else and it was getting dark. I got a little furious. Then when I got back to my room, I thought like Sri Lanka is officially considered a 3rd world country. People live in little houses, houses that wouldn’t even be accepted in many European countries. They see tourists be in hotels paying more for a night than there weekly or monthly wage. And I really started questioning my own behaviour. Do I really need to bargain? Do I want to be that person who bargains for 50 cents? It made me question my own behaviour. And I observed that many others were like me. I decided to be generous. And that’s what people in Sri Lanka taught me. Being helpful. Being kind. Smile. The Sri Lankans I met smiled a lot because I smiled at them! And that’s another thing. When you smile, the world smiles back! Your energy, attitude and respect towards people even of different cultural background matter. It’s what people reflect back to you. I travelled to another area later. And one night it happened. There was a power cut shortage ordered by the government. People didn’t have any power for the whole night basically from 7pm – no WIFI, no lights in the rooms– and that was the night one of the worst thunderstorms hit Sri Lanka – I was in my dark hotel room by the sea being completely scared. I could feel the lightning hit the ocean – or that’s at least what it felt like – as if the ocean was shaking - a feeling I’ve never felt before. It didn’t stop. It made me realise what a precious life we live. Many people desperately want to manifest money and abundance, and I totally get it, I was no different. But in those moments you realise how abundant we are – having light, WIFI, a high standard of living… So, that made me realise that abundance or the lack of it only exists in our head/mind! And the beliefs we hold in our mind make us experience the lack. Something else almost made me tear up. As the lights went off and it was getting dark, there were many tourists who didn’t know about that event and felt lost without WIFI and had no clue how to get home. It was many locals who were there in their poor wood cottages with a candle guiding tourists to their home places, telling the way in such a kind and helpful way. Ironically, a lot of hotels (not mine, as I was staying locally) had power aggregates, they were the only ones who had lights and WIFI. And I had so much respect for those Sri Lankan people guiding people home. Instead of venting about tourists having light, they showed so much compassion. It taught me a lot about humanity. You can have all the money in the world, but at the end of your life you leave without. It’s not how much you have, it’s who you are and how you treat people. I once read a quote “People will forget what you said, but they’ll never forget how you made them feel” And that’s so true for me. I will never forget my stay in Sri Lanka. And while I believe each travel experience is unique, I wouldn’t generalise for a whole nation, my experience was superb. I had another TukTuk driver who told me his dream would be Europe, especially Germany. He told me we would have lots of money. And I told him. “No you live in a dream place here” I think it sparked confusion between both of us wanting to swap countries in that moment. When I came back to Europe, I was so surprised at how fast-paced everything was, how stressed everyone looked. Sri Lankan people had so much less and actually more to worry about than us, and didn’t nearly look and feel so stressed than many people in the streets of many European cities do. So always remember, stress, lack and suffering happen in the mind. In fact, it doesn’t matter where you are. Some people think they first need to travel somewhere to find themselves, and while some countries may have a special energy, you can be happy and joyful everywhere. Joy is an inside state of being. It cannot be achieved through material goods. This doesn’t mean we aren’t allowed to have material goods, of course we do, yet it’s a reminder to appreciate the things we have and what’s truly important, especially in times of great misunderstandings and political insecurities. To come together as one nation. To have compassion for others. To show others love and offer some help if we can help. After I returned back, I knew why I was guided to go to Sri Lanka. I learned so many learning lessons I couldn’t have learned in any book. And it made me aware it’s not what you read in the news or in books, it’s the experience that counts. And it made me realise another thing. How important it is to follow our heart when we travel. Often, we may also travel to a place because it’s “the place to be” or a blogger talks about that or because of the price. I understand that too, however, sometimes it’s not about those shallow reasons, it’s rather where your heart leads you to. I’m so glad I listened to my heart and travelled to that country. It made me feel so rich on the inside, I felt like a better version of myself. So sometimes the countries you feel a magnetic pull towards have a gift for you. And even if it’s no material gift and simply a good time, nice encounters with people or major life realisations. Who knows what countries have to offer. Sometimes following our intuition can lead us to new opportunities. So it’s so much more valuable than all those visualisations and dreams we hold in the mind. Sometimes it’s really important to become “desireless” and allow the ideas and inspiration from your intuition to flow. Just when that sudden idea popped up “Sri Lanka” when I pondered where I could travel. To my mind, it didn’t make that much sense, but I realised my heart knew why. What does this have to do with manifestation you may say? A lot if you ask me. It reminds us to spend our moments consciously. To follow our intuition. To be kind. To be open-minded. To encounter as beings as part of you. The more you move into a state of being like that, the more miracles and opportunities will unfold. I could have gone to XY because someone else found it nice but I wouldn't have made the same experiences.

Here are three tips if you are dealing with depression, low moments, or a phase in your life where things don’t feel well. 1) Remind yourself that you’re not living forever. One day you’ll die. Make the most out of life! What are you waiting for? You can sit here depressed or do something fun in your life. You may say it's not possible, but look at children. Most children don't often think as much as we do as adults! They just do it! They play in the sand, they jump in puddles - they experience a certain form of aliveness by being in the present moment! They don't care what others think or if it's the "right" or "wrong" thing to do. They just do it for the fun of it! Nothing is forever, not even depression. 2) It’s a choice. How you feel and the way you think are choices. Yes, it’s hard to understand. Trust me, many people, including myself, have gone through phases and challenges in their lives that felt tough both emotionally and mentally – so you’re not alone. The only person that can get you out of it is yourself! It depends on what you make out of it. Be overwhelmed by it, or look closer. What has caused it? 3) Even a so called “negative” experience or “illness” can help you find who you truly are. Remember what brings you joy. It can help you to connect yourself deeper and become aware of your internal world. Most people are busy with the "external world", but true healing starts within. The more we master our internal world, the more our external world starts to shift. Inner balance is key. The more we move into inner balance, the more our whole system starts to calm down. When we bring ourselves into an inner state of balance and harmony, we can heal any mental disorder or temporary challenge.

Some people are currently curious which method or technique is the best. I’ve come to realise over the past years that there is no right or wrong technique, there is only the technique that serves you best at this moment in time. That can be different for each one of us. It depends on your level of consciousness, too. Whatever technique feels good for you is the right one for you. I had a time in my life, I was doing a lot of affirmations and it was helping to calm my mind and establish a positive mindset. Later, when I raised my consciousness, I found that affirmations do have certain limitations and it requires more than affirmations to create a life in true abundance. Yet, do I believe that affirmations are wrong? No, they are not. They helped me get to the next step. Sometimes one technique helps you have certain realizations or release certain limitations before you can move to the next phase of your life. Why I am mentioning this is to encourage you not to worry too much about the right or wrong technique. There is no right or wrong. The more we think in terms of right or wrong or whether it will work for us or not, the more we are in the energy of doubt. That’s the least we need when manifesting our desires. Sometimes a certain technique may serve you for a while in order to have some more realisations. From my current observation, there are people with many different levels of consciousness and as a result, there are different methods and techniques to suit different needs and preferences. I also had a time I was worried about finding the right technique and exactly that search kept me from living the life I truly wanted. Why? Because I didn’t trust myself enough. Therefore, my advice is to always trust your inner voice what feels good for you . What feels good for you, is the right technique for you, but not necessarily the right technique for someone else. And yet, it’s fine to question certain beliefs and ways of doing things. Sometimes we outgrow certain methods and techniques and even teachers and mentors, and that is fine. A lot of people are currently reactivating new soul gifts, talents or learning to trust their intuition. It’s a very exciting time and process. Listening to the feeling or inner voice was the most important thing on my journey. It guides you towards the next step that is required for you. The process itself can look different to each single one of us. There is always more than one way to get where we want to be. I If you are unsure, you can always try out different techniques and see what works best for you. So, relax. You're doing fine.

Sometimes, in a world that is full of noise, stimuli and advertisement, taking time alone can be a wonderful opportunity to take a break from everyday life. To take time to slow down. Relax. Recharge. It’s also a great opportunity to connect with yourself. To spend some time to re-evaluate what’s truly important and what no longer aligns in your life. Taking time alone is not selfish or weird; it’s an act of self-love and self-respect. Suddenly you realize how all the stress disappears once you calm your mind. Taking time alone doesn’t necessarily mean you have to travel far, unless you feel guided to. Taking time alone can be a couple of minutes alone in your home, in nature, or somewhere that makes you feel good. Some people may argue that they don’t have time or they have other duties or children, yet it’s our job to fill our cups first. How else can we serve others if our cups are empty? It’s not necessarily about whether we have time, but rather what and who do we make time for? Taking time alone doesn’t mean you feel lonely. You simply enjoy your own company. The better you know yourself, the better you can interact with the world around you. From my observation, especially “introverts” often feel the desire to spend some time alone. Some people are generally very sensitive to loud noise or other people’s emotions and like to spend some time alone. Here are some inspirations on how to spend time alone. 1) Read a book 2) Take a bath 3) Go to nature or the wood 4) Take a quiet seat in your home and simply close your eyes and focus on your breathing 5) Drive to a lake and/or go for a walk 6) Journal 7) Explore a new part of a town by walking and observe the environment In a busy and noisy world, it’s extremely important to spend time for ourselves and recharge. The more we recharge ourselves and become aware of our internal world, the less likely we are to fall into stress, burnout or depression.

One thing I came to realise was the importance of trying. Especially towards our dreams and heart's desires. I noticed in my life that there is often an underlying fear of failing. It is not so obvious at first. But behind distractions, excuses and stories are often fears. And in our society a lot is based on success. But success is relative. There are people that define success by financial gain and there are people that define success by the amount of impact they make in the world. And others don’t even try because they are so scared of failing. Yet, failing is nothing bad. We simply have not learned how to handle failures or we see it as “weak” or “unsuccessful”. Yet, failures can be wonderful teachers. Failures can teach us a lot of lessons. They can teach us about our own limitations. Looking back so far, I learned the most out of my failures. And sometimes I am so grateful that things didn’t work out. Because they were not meant for me and something much better came along. And other times, I simply learned my lesson. And I was even grateful the mistake or failure happened or I couldn’t have understood it any better way. Even if those moments were uncomfortable, they turned out to be a gift much later. So if you have nudge or play with the thought of trying something new - go for it! Don’t let fear of failure hold you back. You can never know how things turn out if you don’t try them. I was scared of trying a lot of times. Until I just gave it a go. It takes courage and some people don’t understand you or think you are out of your mind. Until I realised that’s the best thing to do… Being out of your mind. Literally lol The more you are in your mind, the more overthinking can occur. The less you are in your mind, the more you simply give it a try. And after a while, you take things and opinions of others less seriously. Keep trying!

Finding out what you truly want is key. It is about taking action.

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